Don't be quick to give a title

Ok, so the last blog quite a few people asked me to talk a little bit more on dating.


I find that people do not date enough. What I have seen is that once people go on a date and have a good time, one may feel committed or obligated. Creating titles for people they don't even know.

Sally and Rahiem go on a date...have a good time...after the date they go on another date...now let's saw Sally saw Rahiem out with another girl or vice versa. Should the opposite party get mad??

My answer NO. Why you ask...set guidelines and be up front and honest. LISTEN...a person will tell you what they are looking for...if they say "I don't want a relationship" Do not expect a relationship.

Something else Ive seen is that individuals will equate physical intimacy to love or committment..WRONG.

Wake up Dont be quick to give a title...

Take time...dont let it be soo easy people..

Ill share some tips:

!. See how that person interacts with others in a group setting.

Main reason is they can be one way around you then another way with others. They can't be 2 people all the time. Therefore put it to the test.

2. Its all in the questions asked.... Watch the kind of questions..

Dont just look for the frivolous what kind of music puts you in the mood....

Look at what kind of questions the person asks you if there are only physically geared be careful...

3. Take yourself out of the situation and make sure this is something you want.
Take things slow. Know the main morals and values you WILL NOT compromise. So if you say you will only eat chocolate chip cookies and this person hates chocolate chip...step away and keep moving...that is a very light metaphor but hopefully you get what Im saying...


I hope this helps a little...

Let me know what you want to know next...

ttys,
Coach Cass

The benefits of being single...not being afraid of being alone

So I asked my Facebook people what would like like me to blog about....topic of discussion being single...I actually have found "singlehood" to be exciting. As someone who has been a serial monogomist, I find being single pretty cool. I am a person that always loves the topic of relationships and what are people's beliefs. I've found that views can be SO different. For instance I was told 2 days ago that people don't date enough anymore. This is true, folks are so quick to "sell" themselves to the highest bidder thinking this may be their only chance vs. taking the "shopper's" mentality and just window shop.

The benefits of being single:

1. Take the time out to know who you are!
I read an article with Will and Jada and Jada said something so profound to me: "Be who you want to be first"

Beautiful...going back to the saying "if its for me then it will be" Why rush it?

2. Learn to love yourself

I find through conversations that individuals look to others for love when it should really come from within.
I recommend taking the time to truly dissect why you do what you do... much of who we are, are our parents whether we like it or not. I believe there are generational blessing and curses. So you have to find out what you like about yourself and what you dont like. From there start to build the NEW you for your NEW legacy. Love who you are.

I see a significant other as "icing". You yourself represent the "cake"....too many times we try to make other people the main ingredients, eggs, milk, water...when you should be self-sufficient supplying all needed ingredients. So when done, you taste great but the "icing" just makes you just that much greater....make sense?

3. Embrace alone time.

I have come across many that need to be surrounded by people at all times, but still feel lonely. Feeling lonely is a mindset. Essentially we are born alone and we will die alond, therefore embrace it!

I used to have a fear of being alone...but I came to realize through my countless interviews that it is better to be single, alone, and happy, versus unhappy and in a relationship.

Truly write a list of qualities..lets say 22...22 qualities of what you would really want in a person...look it over..then say to yourself do you have the'se things? If you dont ...focus on making YOU better...because the question becomes okay what do you have to offer...be the best YOU that YOU can be and eventually your light that shines will touch someone's heart...don;t rush it....sit back relax.

Love yourself....

but in the meantime..LIVE IT, BE IT, DO IT! :)

Much love,
Kasaandra

Sleeppp!!!

Here I am yet again ....in dire need of sleep...dreaming about the future and what it holds. I am currently featured in a national magazine: IN-Focus Magazine. I am on the front cover!!! wow God is great...I am honored to be a blessing to othersa. My mom read the article and told me i inspired her. beautiful...ok we shall talk tomorrow 2 sleepy....